Special Report: Recommended Ages on Toys

I often read the directions on products out of curiosity, as well as to maximize the quality of its use. Today, for whatever reason, I decided to read the directions on my body wash. They read: "Squeeze onto a wet pouf or washcloth. Work into a rich, creamy lather and rinse." Now, most people understand the concept of body wash, but if you were actually seeking information on this label, you would have a hard time getting clean. At what point does this product contact your skin? I am I to assume that once the wash cloth has been rinsed I can scrub, or I am I to understand that the company actually forgot a step in a 4 step process?

Toy labels are similar; the guidelines are vague, sometimes offer vast age ranges, and leave a lot up to interpretation. When you're considering whether or not a toy is appropriate for a child, there are really only 3 considerations that label means to express - potential liability, intellectual/ physical complexity, and mature content. Whether or not a person wants their children exposed to swear words, sexual content, or other violence is a personal decision for a parent and has more to do with the child and parenting style than the toy itself. For that reason, let's look more into the other two.

Potential Liability:

This is an obvious concern for parents and toy manufacturers alike. With historical references like lead paint, lawn darts, and the thousands of choking hazard lawsuits, companies take this decision incredibly seriously. This is one way in which you really should consider the intended age range on a given product, and here are some reasons why:

• Newborns have limited head control, so suffocation is a real threat - limit stuffed toys, bumper pads, and clothes with hoods.
• Babies put everything in their mouths, so consider the paint, chemicals, ease of cleaning, and obviously choking potential on any toys.
• Toddlers take risks and like to interact very intently- watch for parts that could snap, pinch, or otherwise unintentionally snare them.
• Preschoolers like to test boundaries -  so now is not the time for beads, finger paints, tiny doll shoes or other insta-messes (if you value your relationship with the parents at all.)  

Intellectual/ Physical Complexity:

This is probably the hardest range for manufacturers to establish. My son actually has a set of stacking pots on which the original age frame was 6-36 months. How on earth did they gauge that? At 10 months when I bought it, it barely caught his eye. At 18 months now, it occasionally peaks his interest. I have a hard time believing that he will still want to interact with it at all in a year's time. Think about the following characteristics:

• Height Restrictions: Trikes, bikes, and other ride-on toys have more to do with how tall the child is than how old they are. Age is only a factor is so far as the average age of a child that is of a given height with a given set of abilities. If your niece was an early walker and a string bean, there's no reason to wait.
• Imagination/ Emotional Age: Even if a product is targeted to an older (or even younger) age group, products mean different things to children at different ages of their lives. If the toy is of little concern in terms of risk, allowing the child to grow with a product or nurture an emotional need is a good thing.
• Development: Since children move through stages at lightening speed, it almost always makes sense to buy a product they are not yet ready for, rather than something that suits them exactly at this moment. Examples include books, clothes, and educational material (science kits, colouring pages, etc).

When a child is overwhelmed by an outpouring of gifts, such as what happens on birthdays and on holidays, items can go underutilized, which is a real shame. Bringing the item that is put away for down the road when the child gets a little bigger is something a parent can really appreciate. If you're still unsure about what's appropriate or even "in" this year, don't be afraid to talk to someone. Ask the parents, a store associate, or even a child playing in that section of the store. With the parent's permission, of course! Randomly talking to a child might give some parents the wrong idea...

Special Report - The Teal Pumpkin Project

Allergies seem to be more prevalent in our society than ever before. While it was common lunchbox fare to have an old fashioned PB&J in the 80’s, now most public schools are peanut-free. The severity of some of these reactions can be fatal, and though we’ve lost a little convenience with the lack of peanut options, the trade off is the security for those poor parents, fearing for their child’s life. This worry really hit home this year with the discovery of my young niece’s allergy to peanuts. It was severe enough to go to the hospital, and to leave us all a little shaken. 


If your child or someone you know suffers from nut, dairy, gluten, or other food allergy, you understand the hesitation that comes with the Halloween loot bag. You have to mercilessly hunt through the content, concerned not just for safety, but now also through an uncertain ingredients list. It might be difficult for younger children to understand why they can’t eat what their friends can, or to sadly watch as their hard-earn loot slowly dwindles to the ones known to be safe – if any. 


Enter FARE –Food Allergy Research & Education. Their website explains:

In 2012, Food Allergy Research & Education (FARE) was formed as the result of a merger between the Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network (FAAN) and the Food Allergy Initiative (FAI). The new organization combined FAAN’s expertise as the most trusted source of food allergy information, programs and resources with FAI’s leadership as the world’s largest private source of funding for food allergy research. Today, FARE is the leading national organization working on behalf of the 15 million Americans with food allergy, including all those at risk for life-threatening anaphylaxis. 

Since the 90’s these two organizations have been working towards awareness and funding to educate the public about food allergies. They have put in place conferences and media campaigns to inform concerned parents and educators of initiatives and support programs. Their latest, starting just last year, is an attempt to take some of that fear and disappointment out of trick-or-treating. 

Participation is simple – parents simply create a bowl of non-food options for those kids who can’t eat the vast majority of treats marketed to Halloween shoppers. They even have a list of fantastic non-food treats available on their website. Here's just a small sample of the seasonal items they suggest:

• Glow sticks, bracelets, or necklaces
• Pencils, pens, crayons or markers
• Bubbles
• Halloween erasers or pencil toppers
• Mini Slinkies
• Whistles, kazoos, or noisemakers
• Bouncy balls
• Finger puppets or novelty toys

Halloween should be fun for so many more reasons than chocolates and candies. There is the fun of costumes, themed crafts and games, and so much more. We will be providing lots of ideas for the coming weeks, but don't forget the main event. Make someone's night by offering a bowl of fun, worry-free items. For more information about this initiative, or to order some of their material, like a pre-made, non-food treat goodie bag, check them out here.

Special Report: Finding a Quality Caregiver

Image borrowed from Huff Post Parents

Having a new born, a toddler, a pre-schooler, or a child of any age really, comes with some interesting challenges when it comes to your to do list. You want to spend time cuddling, colouring, playing on the floor, and all the fun that goes with, but eventually you’re going to run out of underpants if you don’t get some laundry done. If your chores and errands are building up, or perchance, you have an opportunity to get out and have some kid-free fun, you’re going to need a sitter to ensure your little bundle of awesome is okay while you’re out.

Finding a qualified sitter can be a hard thing. You might not feel comfortable asking your crazy friends, you might not have family in town, and maybe your 13 year old neighbor doesn’t have quite enough experience for you to feel comfortable yet. That’s why the clever ladies at Modern Mommy Events have created an opportunity for the residents of my neck of the woods, Guelph, Ontario. It’s a spin on “speed dating,” that classic way for singles to meet up. Parents can have a quick sit down with highly qualified care givers looking for opportunities. It’s a win-win!

If you’re planning on attending the event, or looking to interview some sitters in your own neighborhood, co-founder Eva Shortt has you covered. Here are some questions about what expectations for parents looking for care:

WIYDB: What if I’m new in town? What’s a good place to start?

Modern Mommy: There are some amazing resources in Guelph! As a new mom myself, I find that people are so helpful with recommendations and reviews on caregivers, babysitters, schools and day-cares you just have to start with a simple Facebook search for these groups. Try searching Facebook for Guelph parenting groups. There are a few really popular ones with active members, such as “Guelph Mommies & Due Mommies.”

WIYDB: What’s the going rate now for sitters? What if I just need a 4 hour in-house help/evening out? What if I need a 9 hour work day?

Modern Mommy: Each caregiver is different. It really depends on who you are asking. If you want a specialized Early Childhood Education caregiver your going rate would be approximately $14 an hour. If you are looking to hire a student for a few hours that are looking to make a little bit of extra money their range is between $8-$12 an hour. 

Keep in mind that the age of your child and the time of day have a huge impact on the overall price of your sitter. 

Daycare for babies under 15 months is a lot more expensive than toddler care. 

WIYDB: What sorts of qualifications should I look for in a caregiver?

Modern Mommy: When you are looking for a caregiver you should have some basic guidelines:

- Does this person have up to date first aid?

- What is there experience with kids- ie. Have they worked with kids before?

- What age range have they worked with?

WIYDB: When should I use a babysitter/ short term caregiver?

Modern Mommy: [Use a] babysitter when you need someone for sporadic occasions like a night out with friends or a spouse, a quick errand.

WIYDB: When should you choose a nanny?

Modern Mommy: If you are not yet ready to send your kids off to daycare or preschool and you need someone to be with your child for the duration of the day it is probably best to use a nanny. There are lots of ways to find nannies! There are companies out there that charge a finders fee for finding nannies, they advertise on different websites or you can also find someone through word of mouth.

WIYDB: I’m nervous leaving my little one. What kinds of information should you provide to your sitter for reference?

Modern Mommy: Your phone number in case of emergencies. Then a list of one or two other trusted people in case you are unreachable. If you are planning on having your caregiver watch your child during the day then you should provide them with a list of activities (ie. nap schedule, meal and snack times). If its for the evening/night provide them with a bedtime routine as well as dinner instructions (if necessary).

WIYDB: If I had I night to myself, I wouldn’t even know where to start! Do you have ideas for a fun girls night or a date with someone special?

Modern Mommy: If you are looking for a fun girl’s night out and want to really let loose dancing or karoke are my favorite activities. If you are looking for something more mellow, dinner and drinks at a restaurant are always fun. Some restaurants also provide girls night out and date menus so you can get some pretty good deals. For the crafty moms: bring out some needles and yarn and have yourself a stitch and bitch night. If you love a particular television show then why not get a bunch of girlfriends together and watch it together especially if it is a trashy (yet super addictive) show like the Bachelor!

There are some great date spots here in Guelph! Rent a canoe and go for ice cream at the Boathouse. Dinner at a restaurant (can you tell I am hungry right now? I've got food on the brain!) Or even a romantic stroll in the Arboretum.

The ladies at Modern Mommy Events have tons cooked up for parents looking to connect and talk to other parents. From relaxing conversation in a friendly atmosphere, to high energy social events, they’ve got you covered. For more information about Modern Mommy Events, and for Caregiver Speed Dating ticket information, contact Eva and Jess here. Parent tickets are $25 or $35 at the door.

Special Report: Children's Sizes

Image borrowed from http://backtoherroots.com/

Stats Canada says that the average newborn baby weighs somewhere between 2500g (5lbs 8oz) and 4499g (9lbs 15oz). That’s a huge difference, and that’s only the average! There are so many factors that determine whether your little one will be tiny or on the bigger side, and not all of them have to do with the size of your partner and you. Maybe your baby was early, or late. Maybe that’s just the way genetics sorted itself out! We haven’t even taken in to consideration how babies are differently shaped! Some are long and lean, while others are more solidly built. Some have big feet, which complicates footsie pajamas. Some have long torsos, which means onesies are out grown long before they are too small in the shoulders. 

Stores don’t make it easier either. They all measure differently, with baby sizes coming in vague month ranges or other seemingly arbitrary numbers. How do you know what size your baby even needs? If your baby is born at 6 lbs, you might go through premie, newborn and 0-3 clothes in a matter of weeks! Talk about expensive… Good news! We have done the research for you! We have made some helpful charts, and will offer some hints as to the specifics of some common baby brands.

The hardest time to buy baby clothes is that very first month. Even if you knew the gender, the size of your baby is still largely a mystery. Plus they grow so fast! Since newborns are pretty immobile, buy larger than you think you need and stick to the basics. Basic white onsies and pajamas are the name in the game. They will outgrow that 3 piece set in 2 weeks flat (if they ever fit in to it in the first place), and you know they’ll spit up right before grandma’s house anyways. 

Once you’ve sorted out the early sizing, be sure to have at least a few outfits on hand for the next size up right away. My son went from 6 month, which he was in for almost 4 months to 9 month sizing overnight. He literally ripped a hole in the foot of his pajamas. Then, he was in 12 month sizes within the month. We probably could have skipped 9 months entirely and just rolled up his pants, but since he was so comfortable in 6 months for a while, it was hard to tell! 

6 months is also the time when size gaps begin to broaden (or become completely random) at some stores. Old Navy, for example, classes some items 6-12 months, and they don’t all fit the same. I have a romper that my 14 month old seemed to skip over entirely, but he has a pair of 6-12 month shorts that still fit him quite well, despite his current sizing being largely 18-24 month! And don’t get me started on shoes… Did you know that shoes seem to be sized 0-6 months, 6-12 months, 18-24 months, then sizes 4-13? How does that make any sense?

Even if you think you know the right size, parents take note:

• We've noticed that Carter's clothes (especially pajamas) fit slender, and the pants fit long. 
• Joe Fresh seems to be a bit wider than most, which is most noticeable in the onesies.
• Walmart clothing (for infants anyways) seems to shrink up and bunch in the wash. Items with zippers get that buckled effect.
• Gymboree items wash great and the quality is fantastic, but watch for a sale. The prices might not be worth the amount of time your child is in a given size!

Here's a handy buyer's guide we've created to pick out some of the differences.

Special Report: Teaching "No"

Watching my son develop his independence and unique preferences is pretty amazing. From that little burrito of a person I brought home from the hospital to the fun-loving and adventurous boy I see now is astounding. He walks everywhere, stopping now and then to dance, clap, and experience his surroundings. The problem is, not everything he wants to interact with is safe, friendly, or clean. It’s time to start ingraining a sense of boundaries and teach him that when I say “no” or “don’t” that he has to respect that, for his own good. For a growing mind with limited communication skills, this is hard, and very frustrating. So how to you go about kindly, firmly, and appropriately teaching your child the word “no?” This is a very difficult question. I'm not an expert, but I'm going through it in my own way with my own son.

One major challenge that I'm facing is that it is super hard to keep a straight face when the naughtiness that your child is up to is really cute. You may have seen a commercial in which a pair of well intentioned sisters eagerly beg to keep a filthy dog they have already partially bathed, or the YouTube video in which a father tries to get the story straight from two brothers covered head to toe in paint! The tone that you use to address the behaviour is important, I find. Do your best to be firm and unimpressed. Even if I manage to be tough, sometimes my own dad or my husband is there chuckling in the background! If your child has a sense that what they are doing is funny, they take this as a positive response, and want to repeat it. Sigh...

It's helpful to discuss a consequence for inappropriate actions with other adults (your spouse, the grandparents, any day care workers, etc), so that there is a sense of consistency in how you approach the correction. Establish an age-appropriate punishment, explain it, and stick to your guns no matter the results.

To be clear, when I say explain, I mean tell your child what about their actions is wrong or unsafe so they can start to choose differently. I don’t think you should have to explain your parenting or consequence philosophy to anyone else. What seems right to you might seem too kind, or too harsh, depending on the background and generation of the commenter. Don’t let that sway you. No one knows your child better than you, and so long as you’re not doing anything too severe (such as any form of bodily harm) your system is just as good as anybody’s.

For my little guy, we always point at what the problem is, strongly say no, and remove him from the situation. He’s still small, so this sometimes takes a few tries, but when he realizes that continued attempts to, say, remove the night light from the socket, will keep getting him carried across the room, he gets tired of it and stops. Older children might need a time out step or chair, grounding, or other punishment. You'll find something that makes sense for your own child.

If a certain item is a trigger for bad behaviour, such as the cat’s dish, that night light, the rolling ottoman etc, the easiest thing to do is to remove the temptation outright. For items that can’t be removed or made safe, you need to make the object unappealing, and use repetition to establish that interaction with it is not allowed. This can ultimately result in some serious frustration and lead to a meltdown; the pout and point, throwing their head back, shrieking... It’s going to happen more than a few times in a child’s life, and handling an escalation is not easy. For very young kids, a distraction is usually enough. Don’t reward the tantrum with toys or candy, but singing, pointing out a nearby dog, or tickling have all been successful for me.

Being a disciplinarian is not easy, and I know it's only going to get harder. The job of a parent is to keep your child safe, and that doesn't always make you their best friend. There are always good days and bad days. Lean on your spouse, your mom, or a mommy friend to get you through it. They may not understand now why they can't eat the computer cables, or why climbing the bookshelf isn't a good idea, but that's okay. They will appreciate it later. Don't you?